Yep !!!!!
2 eclipses later and someone help me get back to normal ! Intense, Mega, Depth, and heightened amounts of feelings that came over me during this period. An eclipse always brings to the surface the shit you'd rather not have at the surface. It was weird for me, I kinda had a lot of shit going down. According to my Astro friends the Solar eclipse was about "Letting Go". And that I did.....
So letting go.......of what ? Well for me, the crap that doesn't serve me anymore ! This can be anything really. A jumper, a favorite mug or even people. Sure....but it's usually a bit bigger than that. How about "Deserving" ? not letting go of it ! But letting go of NOT !! Yeh, "Not Deserving". I've met people who are so stuck in not deserving they only think in lack. What's with this ?? I think it's from the brainwashing we all received early on, that took away the Self Worth, Self Esteem, and the ability to acknowledge that you deserve. You deserve abundance, yet so many of us have been trained in the art of "Lack" ! What a fucked thing to teach !! But not when you want to control the masses though, oh no !! and that's just it, most peeps don't even realise, let alone ask the question....Why do I believe in "NOT DESERVING" ?? This is what an eclipse can do for you.
Let this crap go !!!!!! You deserve all, you deserve to be happy, you deserve to feel content and abundant. You are a beam of light and energy that is trying to awaken. Yet with so much pressure and material brainwashing we cannot break this pattern. Why is this ? The last eclipse was tiny, not even visible to the human eye, yet it tore shreds off me. The letting go thing isn't always easy to do though. How do you let go of a person you no longer vibrate with on the same level ? This is actually quite hard to do, especially if this person is or was close to you. They seem fine for some time, yet deep down you kinda knew at the start that this would not last. In my case it was a buddy, who for some time was fantastic to hang around. We were Bro's, but when people step over your boundaries and become a menace, I tend to lose interest in the friendship.
Is it wrong to get rid of someone out of your life for bringing a box of vegetables to your house when they know your fridge is tiny after asking them to just pick up a small bit of broccoli? Now this is not the only reason this guy was culled, of course it is a build up of shit over time. Yet this was the last straw !! When you ask someone to just grab a small piece of broccoli, and they roll up with the entire fruit and veg section, and then say to you that will be 45 bux............what the fuck would you do ? No way bro, I only asked for a piece of broccoli !!!!!!! Please, don't get me wrong ! This is not just over a box of fruit and veg, it always starts way back and you don't realise till you get to a space like this. Little things become apparent when you've let this flip go. How many times they actually look down on you, or belittle you in front of other people. Fuck you I say, thanks for the lessons and I am now letting you go !!!!!
Allowing things that don't serve you anymore to stay in your life is as absurd as walking around with an umbrella waiting for it to rain !! It could be anything, so wake up and get rid of those things. Send the item or person Love and send them on their way.
At the end of the day, what this means is you have risen your vibration to a higher level, and really can't communicate or feel properly on that level anymore.....When you let go of something, you automatically clear space for abundance. You do not create lack by letting something go !
Anyway Love and Light will always prevail
Peace
So...............
Its 2am in the morning and I'm still up !! Thinking, planning, manifesting. Sometimes we all do this don't we ? I've just been out howling at the current half moon, its rather bright for a half moon actually. I enjoyed the rays beating on my head. It was cleansing and motivated me to attend to my "Blah" !
I've been quite busy working in the incorrect dimension that is the paddock where most reside, full of sheep. What a matrix it is out there. Rush, rush, quick hurry up ! Talk about fucked up, I mean really, what is going on out there ? I've just completed 3 weeks straight with a mob of children, yep children, yet these children are all middle aged and really know nothing of the inner child. All they do is project it all day, every day. I tell you I came so close to snapping, it was so hard to stay controlled while being bombarded with sarcasm all fucking day. These flips never stop and when it's time to be serious about the job the old wolf comes out and cries. You don't know when it's serious and when it's not.
It seems the Australian male only has the intelligence to be sarcastic all the time. I "FUCKEN" hate it !!!!!! The mask is so obvious !!!!!! The inner demon, the insecurity, the.....what do you reckon mate ? Lets fuck him up with this comment.............I'm so bloody over this shit ! So...... I speak up after my boundaries have been pushed to the limit. Then the big boss (cause of the problem) pays a visit...... "I hear you had a problem with a bucket of water yesterday mate" and I reply "Ahhh........yes that's correct" and this boofhead says to me "Its all in good fun mate" The wanker has no idea whats gone down, he's heard the story from the child like grown men. I'm not even going to bother with this anymore actually, I can't be bothered re living it !!!!
So.......onward and upward. Working under these types of conditions take their toll. I can't even feel properly. Its rather disturbing actually, and worries me a little. You see what this stuff does to you is bring you down and slowly melts your soul, the soul of a number 2, the life long path of the sensitive. Even if you are as spiritual as me, it has an effect on us all. What I can't believe is that so many people go through this every day and don't realise what it does to the soul !! Wake up.............. I'm sorry but other peoples projections of psychic vampirism don't really do it for me anymore. Not only has there been mental pain, but also physical pain. This only occurs when I'm not doing what I'm supposed to be doing. What I'm here to be doing, "THIS" and art therapy and intuitive counselling. All this to raise more funds so that in the eyes of my psych I'm seen to be doing it properly before my next move. Yeh.......plans are in motion, and I can't wait. Although, I question why I'm going about it in this way....."The Normal Way", why not just go ????
I still don't know the answer to this ???? Everything is utter perfection while writing and healing, yet I'm punishing myself working for these goons. How and why do we continually put ourselves in the situations ??
Love, Light and Look for Answers people
Well..........
It's been a while since my last blah. This is because we tend to get lost in the Void, the place of pain, darkness, anxiety, confusion.....who am I and what am i doing here. WTF is going on on this sphere ??????? I go into this space quite regularly, and of my own choice (I allow it, rather than fighting it). This may sound MAD, and it is. But when you've had a taste of it and completed the vortex that took you there, you do come through the other side, and that light that you saw, that was but a pin prick at the end of the tunnel, suddenly becomes bigger and bigger and light flows in and around you. And ohhhhhhhh that feeling of temporary completion until we meet again in the dark. This has just occurred for me. Each time its different, different lessons, different feelings and mixed up energy and vibrations.....
Its like a bloody rollercoaster !!!!
Its like being a bird. You have wings and you fly of course, but during this period, which can last a day, a week, a month or whatever ! You are that bird, flying up in the cosmos in your own jetstream. And the void is the place where you cross over into another jetstream higher up. So, what happens is, the higher jetstream is vibration or consciousness and the universe is allowing you to make the change (because it always knows when YOU are ready) and to leave behind that place that you are at, and to move forward. But its not that easy, you fly up to that higher jetstream, which exhausts you. So you then fly straight through it, past it !! You don't judge the landing right. This continues as you try to get back to the comfort zone jetstream, the one that you came from. But no, you are going forward, not back to those things that no longer serve you. This happens over and over again, which leaves your head and soul spinning.
You know those chrome balls that are on a metal frame ? You pull one ball back and the other ball moves when it hits. You can do it with multiple balls too. This is whats happening ! You have to wait for the balls to settle down, and this is what happens with the bird, yet YOU, the bird, are doing all the work to stabilize all the shit you are going through. Sending it out to the universe, asking for help, doing your astrology, doing tarot, doing cards, pleading with the night sky to HELP !!! That's what I do when I've flown past that bloody jetstream a few times. I go and howl at the night sky saying......"Please HELP ME" !!!! Plus I look for answers. Meanwhile my whole life is in turmoil. No work, no money, living with not the perfect house mates blah fucken blah. I always push through in the end. Once its all cool again and I slowly gain confidence, the self worth starts to come back, there is heaps of work and abundance back.
Now, I'm on the higher jetsream !!!! I made the landing after the migration and all is ok. My problem is, I'm addicted to the VOID, even though it sux. But once you break through its "Beautiful"
"I can't wait for the next VOID"
WOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOO
These are those jetstreams when you look back down at what youv'e accomplished, learned and been through, although from underneath they are nowhere near as pretty. You gotta breakthrough the VOID to FEEL this stunning vibration
Love, Light and Pass through your VOID with dignity ;-))
